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This post: The POWER of Role-Playing with Your Teen (55 Strong Comebacks When They’re in a Tight Spot)
Written By: Nancy Reynolds
I’ve always taught my kids to be strong…
I remember back when they were in preschool I was always encouraging them to stand up for themselves, to not allow anyone to push them into doing something they didn’t want to do, and why they shouldn’t jump on the bandwagon when a classmate or friend was misbehaving. And, for a time, my “be strong” guidance and pep talks worked beautifully. Until, that is, they became teenagers and the pressure became far more intense.
I’ll never forget the day I started role-playing with my oldest daughter. She was 14 at the time and came home from a night out hanging with friends looking defeated.
The minute she walked in the door, I knew something had happened. After some gentle prodding (and a plate of her favorite cookies), she finally opened up.
“Mom, I didn’t know what to say,” she admitted, slumping onto the couch.
She’d been hanging out with a group of close friends when someone pulled out a vape pen and started passing it around. She knew what vaping was and had even seen other kids vape, but this was the first time her friends were vaping. She wasn’t interested, but when the moment came to say no, she froze. Instead of speaking up, she just shook her head and tried to laugh it off.
“They kept pushing, and I felt so awkward. I just wanted to disappear,” she said.
That moment hit me hard. My smart, confident, capable daughter – who had strong opinions about nearly everything – had been caught off guard in a situation she wasn’t prepared for. And she didn’t have the words ready when she needed them most. That’s when I realized…
We practice everything else in life. So, why can’t our kids practice standing up for themselves?
After all, we teach our kids to tie their shoes, drive a car, and say “Thank you” when someone holds the door. But when it comes to one of the hardest parts of growing up – navigating peer pressure and uncomfortable situations – we often just hope they’ll figure it out in the moment or that “NO” will confidently roll off their tongue.
But what if they don’t? And, what if it doesn’t? What if they let their worry or fear of looking lame, weak, or uncool in front of their friends get in the way of making a sound decision they know they should make?
That’s where role-playing comes in.
Why Role-Playing Works
At first, my daughter rolled her eyes when I suggested we practice some responses. “Mom, I don’t need a script,” she groaned. But after running through a few scenarios – some serious, some silly – she started to see the value. She laughed as she experimented with different ways to say no and even came up with her own comebacks.
Role-playing gives our kids something incredibly powerful:
Muscle Memory for Their Words
Just like athletes practice plays before the big game, our kids need to rehearse their responses so they don’t freeze when it matters. It takes the pressure off in real-life situations because they’ve already practiced saying them over and over again.
Confidence to Stand Up for Themselves
When they know exactly how to respond, they don’t have to second-guess themselves. They can say what they mean, stand firm in their decisions, and move on without feeling awkward or unsure.
Reassurance That They’re Not Alone
And perhaps most importantly, role-playing reminds them that we’re in this struggle together. When we take the time to practice responses with our teens, we send a clear message: I see you. I hear you. I know this is hard. But, I’m here to help you and we’re in this TOGETHER.
So, if your teen has ever struggled to find the right words in a tricky situation (and let’s be honest, they probably have), this list of 55 strong comebacks is for them.
From handling peer pressure to shutting down uncomfortable conversations, role-playing with your teen can equip them with the powerful tools they need to help them stand their ground – without being rude or feeling awkward or unprepared. Let’s give our teens the words they need to protect themselves and make choices they feel good about. Because being prepared isn’t just smart – it’s empowering.
General Peer Pressure Responses
1. “I’m good, thanks.”
2. “No thanks, that’s just not my thing.”
3. “I’d rather sit this one out.”
4. “That’s not for me, but you do you.”
5. “Sorry, I’ve made my decision and I’m’ sticking with it.”
6. “I’m not interested, but I’d still love to hang out.”
7. “I’m not sure I can. I’ll let you know.
8. “Nah… I just don’t feel comfortable with that.”
9. “I’ll think about it and let you know.”
10. “No way… If my Mom finds out, I’ll be grounded for life.”
Comebacks for When a Friend Is Pushing Too Hard
11. “Bruh, I’ve got a lot going on right now. I can’t.”
12. “I would never pressure you to do something you don’t want to do, so please don’t pressure me.”
13. “I have other plans. Maybe another time, bruh.”
14. “No… I’m not into that.”
15. “I know you want me to join in, but I’m not comfortable with that. Thanks, anyway.”
16. “I have a game tomorrow, I can’t” OR “My mom said I have to stay home and clean my room”
17. “Thanks but my Mom is making me go to this family thing tomorrow. Sorry.”
18. “My Dad is making me help him clean out the garage that day. I can’t.”
19. “I tried it before.” (even if they haven’t). “It’s definitely not my thing.”
20. “I could get kicked off the team if my coach finds out. I’m not willing to risk it.”
Comebacks for Awkward or Unsafe Social Situations
21. “I don’t feel comfortable here – I’m gonna head out. Catcha later.”
22. “I gotta trust my gut on this one and it’s telling me to say no.”
23. “This isn’t something I want to be involved in.”
24. “I’ve got way too much to lose to take this risk… I’m out.”
25. “I told my mom I’d be home at a certain time. I gotta head out.”
26. “This isn’t for me – I hope you can respect that.”
27. “My mom just texted me. I need to head home now.”
28. “This situation doesn’t sit right with me. I’m heading out.”
29. “Sorry… I’d rather not be part of this.”
30. “This is (dangerous/wrong/illegal, etc). Count me out.”
Comebacks for When Pressured Into Drinking, Vaping, or Drugs
31. “Nah, thanks, I’m not into that.”
32. “I just don’t feel like doing that.”
33. “I don’t need to do that to have fun, but you do you.”
34. “That’s not something I’m willing/ready to try.”
35. “I know I’ll regret it later so it’s a no for me.
36. “I have to study for a big test all day tomorrow and I can’t do that after a night of drinking or getting high.”
37. “Dude… my Dad would send me into next week if he found out.”
38. “Nope. My parents wait up for me. If I walk in the door stoned or drunk, I’d be grounded for life.”
39. “I tried that once before and I regretted it. I’m not doing it again.”
40. “Nope. Not for me. Thanks, though.”
(Toss in a Little Humor to Soften Your “No”)
41. “Yeah, and if my parents find out, you’ll never see me again.”
42. “Dude, you know I can’t handle stuff like that. I’d be on the floor.”
43. “Thanks, I like my lungs just the way they are.”
44. “Thanks, I don’t need that stuff to get a little crazy. You know me… I act crazy already.”
45. “I’m pretty sure I would die… like literally.”
Comebacks for When Pressured Into Sex
46. “No.” I’m not ready for that.”
47. “No. If you care about me, you won’t pressure me.”
48. “I want to wait until it feels right for me.”
49. “No. Please don’t ask again.”
50. “This isn’t something I’m comfortable with.”
51. “If you can’t respect my wishes our relationship isn’t going to work.”
52. “If you really care about me, you won’t push me into doing something I’m not ready or willing to do.”
53. “I care about you, but this isn’t something I’m ready to do.
54. “I’ve decided to wait until I’m married (or in a serious relationship) before I have sex. So, the answer is no.”
55. “No. I need you to respect me and my wishes.”
These are just a few responses that can help your teen stand firm while keeping their friendships and relationships respectful and drama-free. Your teen can tweak these as they see fit to make them their own.
Remember, when you’re role-playing with your teen, make sure they know that a calm, confident “NO” is powerful and all they really need to say in ANY situation. However, it can be easier for teens to say “no” when they soften the blow a bit. Above all, remind them that knowing what to say in the moment can make all the difference in how they handle it.
If you enjoyed reading, “The POWER of Role-Playing with Your Teen (55 Strong Comebacks When They’re in a Tight Spot),” here are a few other posts you might like:
How to Handle Peer Pressure: 13 Genius Ways Your Teen Can Get Out of a Tight Spot
The Party Scene: How to Talk to Your Teen About Alcohol and Peer Pressure