Oh, hi there, new college mom.
It’s me. The woman who was in your shoes last year.
Actually I’m in the same shoes right now because I have another high school senior so you know; here we go again. The nerves. The anxiety. The fear. (Them AND us, right?)
I’m here for you. I got you covered.
First off: Remember that worrying is like walking around with an umbrella, waiting for it to rain. I excel at this so honestly, I mean it when I say take a deep breath. And one day at a time.
10 tips for parents who are preparing to send their teens off to college
1. Your teen is going to college
Take a moment to celebrate this. Just bask in it for a few minutes before starting to panic about twin x-long sheets. Go out to dinner. Give lots of hugs (if they let you) and just look at your baby and give yourself a pat on the back. You did good.
2. Okay. Done celebrating
Now start googling. Kidding. But do reach out to friends who have walked your walk because you want to have a really good packing list ready. But don’t fret. It’s only January. No need to rush this.
3. Let your senior enjoy the rest of their senior year
It goes by super quick. Before you know it you’re taking prom pictures, going to senior night activities and ordering the yearbooks.
4. See above
Don’t start talking college stuff too prematurely. They may be happy with their college choice. They may still be reeling over the fact they didn’t get into their top choice. Maybe they’re going cross country to school and feeling angst and excitement all at the same time. Let them feel all the feels because you’re probably feeling them too. Enjoy the days with them under your roof.
5. Come May, you can start clipping coupons
Because now is the time to take advantage of the list that perhaps you’ve already started working on. Remember, organization is your friend. (Think under bed boxes, extra storage drawers, little nightstand thingamajigs that clip on under the mattress and hold your phone)
6. Roommate angst
Something else not to prematurely worry about. It is what it is. They will either like their roommate or they won’t. Or somewhere in between. Roommates don’t need to be best friends. They need to cohabitate and be respectful. If they aren’t besties they will meet friends in other ways.
7. Parent pages
Helpful and not so much. They are great for learning about local restaurants, should I rent the refrigerator and micro combo, best dorm for freshman, etc. But take things with a grain of salt. Every one finds fault in something. The food sucks, the dorms smell, the professors aren’t communicating well, I don’t like what the school president said at the meet and greet. Try to not harp on the negative comments and take away the positives.
8. Again. Utilize your friends with older children
They’re the best resources (especially on what to pack).
9. Start taking a step back.
I know this is hard one. Your baby is leaving for college. They will no longer be under your roof, knowing where they are and what they’re doing. But you need to do this-for you. For you to remember that you have raised them for almost 18 years and now it’s time to let them figure some stuff on out on their own. Believe me, they’re still calling you to ask about doing laundry but you may want them to practice this before—let’s say, September 1st.
10. And finally, there are tears
Maybe not for all of you but there were loads for me. I was strong until he actually had to say goodbye. To leave me in the bleacher stands as we watched the new class of 2026 follow each other into their orientation groups and learn to navigate a whole new life.
This is hard. For your students. For us parents. We get sentimental. We may, hypothetically, go home, look at baby pictures and cry as you pass their empty bedroom. You may cry because you have no idea if they’re doing okay. Are they sitting alone in the cafeteria? Are they feeling good vibes from their roommate? Did they wear their new flip flops in the shower?
It’s really hard. The unknown. But this is the time we need to let them fly. And to figure it out. We have to fail sometimes. We need to learn to try different approaches and new activities and put ourselves way out of our comfort zone. It’s called life. And just because your babies aren’t babies anymore, they will really always still be our babies.
More Great Reading:
How to Help Your College Freshman When They’re Homesick